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Coaching Men: A Direct Approach to Intimacy and Sexuality

Coaching Men: A Direct Approach to Intimacy and Sexuality

I was asked to contribute a “sex and intimacy coaching” chapter for the book Breaking Barriers in Counseling Men: Insights and Innovations This book is a brilliant compilation of out-of-the-box strategies to use in coaching or counseling men. If you work with men...

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Say the One Thing to “Shock her into Love”

Say the One Thing to “Shock her into Love”

You know those times when the woman you're with is talking about something that she doesn't really care about, and you're only half-listening, because you know she doesn't care? What do you do when that's happening? Do you just keep pretending to listen,...

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Dave Chappelle goes off!

Dave Chappelle goes off!

Watch Dave Chappelle ROCK the premature ejaculator label! There’s a lot to enjoy in this clip, but one of the things I love the most is Dave’s lack of shame about ejaculating early: “If I come, man, it was right on time.” Dave gets laughs on this line because men are not supposed to ejaculate early, yet he’s completely owning and celebrating it. He even dares to compare himself to an Olympic athlete! I love it

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Kiss her like there’s no tomorrow

Kiss her like there’s no tomorrow

Think about the last time you kissed a woman on the lips. (Or a guy, if you're gay or a straight woman.) I'm not talking about a friendly kiss — like a "peck" on the mouth — but a kiss of some length. Maybe it was with your wife, your girlfriend, or a girl you...

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Your porn habit and the film “Don Jon”

Your porn habit and the film “Don Jon”

Watching the movie Don Jon stirred up a lot for me. Have you seen it? If not — and if you're interested in seeing a well-done portrayal of how of internet porn affects young men these days — I recommend you watch it right away. The movie is about a good-looking guy in...

read more

Breaking out of your bedroom routine

When you start getting bored in bed, it’s easy to blame your partner. But more often than not, you're the one who’s gotten stuck in some pattern that you’ve outgrown, but you don’t see it. Or maybe you get a whiff of the pattern, but you’re not ready to admit it to...

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The Power of the Pause

During sex, one of the most important things you can do is significantly slow down or even stop the action and consciously connect with your partner. It can make a huge difference in how connected she feels to you — and, thus, how much she’s willing to open to you....

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Sex with Your Clothes On

Make yourself more desirable by becoming a good dancer. Last week, at an event I was attending, I introduced a female friend of mine to a guy I know. The three of us chatted for a few minutes, and then he excused himself. I asked her if she thought he was...

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What’s your sex style?

Have you ever had a sexual “misfire” with a partner when it seemed like the two of you were talking different languages in bed? Maybe your eyes were closed and you were deeply feeling your physical sensations, but, dammit, your partner kept bugging you to look at her....

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What does your woman really need?

Men: Have you ever experienced sex with a woman when she’s completely open to you? When she’s a full and uninhibited Yes! to you as a sexual man? If you’ve experienced wild feminine openness, you know what I’m talking about. But if you haven’t, let me tell you: It’s...

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The three sex styles. Which one will women say is yours?

The three sex styles. Which one will women say is yours?

Sex — an act as innate as eating and breathing for most animals — can be nothing short of a confusing mess to humans. During sex, it’s usually tough to track what’s going on at any given time — physically, emotionally and energetically. Everything is happening at...

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It’s time for some squirrel sex!

It’s time for some squirrel sex!

Yep. That's right. I’m suggesting that you have sex LIKE a squirrel. Not WITH a squirrel. That's a post for another time 😉 OK, OK, I’ll explain. Yesterday I was watching two squirrels play in the redwood grove in my backyard. I know they were playing because it...

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Say the One Thing to “Shock her into Love”

Say the One Thing to “Shock her into Love”

You know those times when the woman you're with is talking about something that she doesn't really care about, and you're only half-listening, because you know she doesn't care? What do you do when that's happening? Do you just keep pretending to listen,...

read more
Dave Chappelle goes off!

Dave Chappelle goes off!

Watch Dave Chappelle ROCK the premature ejaculator label! There’s a lot to enjoy in this clip, but one of the things I love the most is Dave’s lack of shame about ejaculating early: “If I come, man, it was right on time.” Dave gets laughs on this line because men are not supposed to ejaculate early, yet he’s completely owning and celebrating it. He even dares to compare himself to an Olympic athlete! I love it

read more
Kiss her like there’s no tomorrow

Kiss her like there’s no tomorrow

Think about the last time you kissed a woman on the lips. (Or a guy, if you're gay or a straight woman.) I'm not talking about a friendly kiss — like a "peck" on the mouth — but a kiss of some length. Maybe it was with your wife, your girlfriend, or a girl you...

read more
Your porn habit and the film “Don Jon”

Your porn habit and the film “Don Jon”

Watching the movie Don Jon stirred up a lot for me. Have you seen it? If not — and if you're interested in seeing a well-done portrayal of how of internet porn affects young men these days — I recommend you watch it right away. The movie is about a good-looking guy in...

read more

Breaking out of your bedroom routine

When you start getting bored in bed, it’s easy to blame your partner. But more often than not, you're the one who’s gotten stuck in some pattern that you’ve outgrown, but you don’t see it. Or maybe you get a whiff of the pattern, but you’re not ready to admit it to...

read more

The Power of the Pause

During sex, one of the most important things you can do is significantly slow down or even stop the action and consciously connect with your partner. It can make a huge difference in how connected she feels to you — and, thus, how much she’s willing to open to you....

read more

Sex with Your Clothes On

Make yourself more desirable by becoming a good dancer. Last week, at an event I was attending, I introduced a female friend of mine to a guy I know. The three of us chatted for a few minutes, and then he excused himself. I asked her if she thought he was...

read more