Jim’s programs and offerings
Take a look at this list of life experiences, circumstances, and personality types — you may find yourself in one or more of the categories. Most men who come to coaching with me are dealing with a combination of issues.
See if any of these fit for you.
Newly dating after divorce
You may find yourself at the edge of a new frontier of relationship — equal parts scary and exciting.
It could be that…
- You haven’t had sex with anyone other than your ex in 15 years.
- Maybe you simply forgot how to date and seduce.
Maybe your marriage left you with relational and sexual confusion or scarring.
Not a lot of sexual experience
A heavy cultural stigma, this can be the case for men both young and old. Sexuality is a skill that can — and should — be taught!
You May Have…
- Entered into a monogamous with your high school sweetheart and are just leaving that relationship
- Lacked the self-assurance and right circumstances to get the sex you wanted
- You may be looking to gain the confidence you need to become more of a sexual rock star
Sexual flatline in a long-term relationship
You might be asking yourself…
- How does the person you negotiate life with remain your steamy-hot lover?
- How do you cross the barriers to intimacy and create a juicy sex life?
- What is your half of the equation?
Porn dependency / addiction
Ah, porn. While not inherently negative, it can significantly inhibit your ability to have a satisfying intimate relationship with another person
Together, we will…
- Assess the degree to which your porn use prevents you from getting the love and sex you want
- Create strategies and practices to ease out of addiction (if necessary)
Establish lifelong healthy balance between intense visual stimulation and flesh-and-blood (and heart!) contact
Recovering from sexual abuse
While I am not a therapist trained with the necessary skills to meet all the needs of a trauma survivor, I do welcome the honor of helping men with a history of violation recover their sexual birthright.
- If you feel you have previously gained enough support, stability, and self-awareness to deepen your connection with your sexuality… I will walk with you on a well-paced path toward reclaiming both pleasure and power.
If done with respect and care, polyamory/ethical nonmonogamy requires excellent communication, consideration, and compassion for all involved.
While stable, healthy, and satisfying polyamorous relationships are certainly possible, these explorations can also raise shadowy issues like jealousy, abandonment fears, and painful comparison.
I help you…
- Navigate the path of polyamory
- Determine if it is truly right for you at this point in your life
- Work and talk through the process of opening your existing relationship, or establishing your first polyamorous relationship
- Explore and define boundaries
Being a “pleaser”
These questions point to a loss of sexual connection with yourself, and are often a source of mediocre, unsatisfying sexual experiences.
I invite you to work together to find new balance with your power dynamics.
Have you noticed a tendency to focus primarily on your partner during sex?
Do you consider yourself successful if they’ve come even if you haven’t?
Do you have sexual desires you think about, but rarely speak?
- The physical and mental components of a sex life fraught with anxiety.
- I can help you move through shame, discomfort, and a busy, strategizing mind so you can relax into your natural sexual confidence as a man.
The most import things to know are:
It’s not your fault! Nature designed you to ejaculate as soon as possible
- You can learn to last longer, increase your and your parter’s pleasure
- The first step is to lower your stress levels associated with this “condition”
More common than most folks think, fetishes are a deeply personal link to fulfilling sexual expression, and I support men in exploring them.
- I coach men who have not yet fully embraced their “kink” to explore and integrate the drive behind the fetish.
- As a result, they begin to find liberation through acceptance of this aspect of their sexuality.
Jim’s work created so many powerful changes in me — it made me feel twice as alive, vibrant, and powerful. He reinforced my latent talents and joyous aliveness and gave me confidence to share myself fully with my friends and family — with men, women, and the world. My earning potential probably more than doubled as a result of the Awakened Masculine work.”
— Michael C, Tempe, AZ
Jim Benson has been an important part of my sexual recovery over the past year. After my girlfriend moved out, I realized how much I had given myself away. Doing so many things for her, and so few for me. No wonder she left. I had lost the connection to myself that attracted her to me in the first place. Now I feel like I have my mojo back. And I’m pretty sure it’s here to stay!”
— Nate T, Philadelphia, PA
Using the many tools he has developed, Jim showed me how to blend within myself the strong masculine (who is not afraid to impregnate the world with the light of his conscious mind and body), and the nurturing feminine. I highly recommend any man who is on his path to spend time with Jim and his work. My life has changed since doing so.”
— Peter E, Lagunitas, CA
Just a note to say how much I appreciated our work together this past year, Jim. I’m relating to women in an entirely new way. Instead of approaching, as you say, ‘like a beggar with a bowl,’ I’m feeling confident (and maybe a little cocky sometimes!) in who I am as a man.”
— Kal R, Byron Bay, AU